Understanding Interracial Dating And Relationships

Understanding Interracial Dating And Relationships

This week, I was listening to an American anti-racism activist, Jane Elliot. While she practically broke down each of my theories and all my understanding about what racism actually was, it also got me thinking. What happens to racial discriminations and biases when people of different races date? What happens on interracial dating sites and beyond them?

 

I tried to look up some keywords around interracial dating and one of the most repeated and prominent results I found was free black dating sites. It got me thinking more. If a Chinese dates an American or a Latino, would that not be interracial dating too? Then why does even the best dating site designed for inter racial matches, claims to be mostly a black dating site?

I then probed deeper only to discover that interracial dating is surrounded by some very strong stereotypical myths and I decided to share some of the most prominent ones in this article.

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The first myth, I’ve already busted. It’s not about black and white. Any two people from any two different races are in an interracial relationship. There’s the ‘yellow fever’, the ‘exotic brown’, the ‘spicy latino’ and of course the white people. All of these dynamics can be and should be found on interracial dating sites.

Second, it’s not about just sex. I’m sure my usage of phrases like yellow fever’, the ‘exotic brown’, the ‘spicy latino’ instantly made you think of certain specific body types. But people, relationships and dating are not about people’s bodies. They are about the people themselves.

This brings me to my next point. There’s a huge difference between admiring someone and making a fetish of them; that too, not on a personal level, but on the scale of an entire race? Believe me, it’s NOT cool! Any site that claims to be the best dating site should actually be promoting people, dating ethics and profiling parameters other than the race of a person.

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Now, another bubble to bust! If you’re in an interracial relationship, you’re NOT, I repeat, NOT solving the problem of racism. You’re only doing what any sane and educated person should do. Love, date or be in a relationship with another person. Sure, your existence as a couple defies the common norms. I do NOT deny it. But is that really solving the problem of judgment? No, it is only indicating your acceptance of humanity.

 

Yet another! And I tell you this one isn’t even stupidly funny! If people of color date white people, it’s not because they have an inherent inferiority complex. It’s because these white people are good people with genuine, warm hearts and appealing personalities.  Don’t go around labeling people and stereotyping their relationships, when you don’t even know them.

 

However, all these myth busters make me think again. Why is this question of interracial dating even a question? Apart from the propaganda that the dating websites sell; for instance, claims to being interracial dating sites, free black dating sites, the best dating site and more such accolades; why should race even matter ? Aren’t all of us, like Jane Elliot says, people of a single race – the human race?

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How Dating Sites Are Changing Our Society

How Dating Sites Are Changing Our Society

The other day, I was sitting with some colleagues in the sociology department. I heard them discussing online dating and the various websites etc. that exist. They were also talking of trends and how online dating was slowly and gradually picking up.

At some point however, the discussion started heating up when someone brought up the subject of an adult dating site and how they deteriorate the society. They discussed how each of these so-called free dating sites claimed to be the best dating site, while all they do is encourage ‘immoral’ behavior.

Now that was boo’ed obviously! However, opinion of a conservative colleague or two aside, the discussion did get me thinking. You know how we academics are, always boring, focused on data and research rather than people. Unless you’re talking of the psychologists, I guess. However, do adult dating sites actually add any value to the society at all? Let’s examine.

First things first whether they are free dating sites or paid, all adult dating sites, acknowledge a basic, primal human need. Now if you ask me, I see that as an attempt to reduce the hypocrisy. I’m sure all of you who’ve tried online dating have come across people who have ulterior motives. More often than not, the two major ulterior motives are either money or sex.

Now if we leave money out classifying it as a scam, sex still remains a major motive. If people are going to look for sex but claim otherwise, al that will happen in the process is hypocrisy and hurt. In that sense even the best dating site in the world would not be able to create much meaning for the adult dating community. In that sense these websites encourage honesty and candour.

On another level, all adult dating sites could also be claimed to encourage immoral behavior. However, is there really anything such as ‘immoral’ behavior? I mean give ‘em a break. All they are doing is looking for adult fun. I’m sure you do not expect them to pop corn, watch Netflix and have a can of coke on their dates? I think these websites help people explore more than superficial texting / sexting or pretentions and that in itself is great value.

More important than not, it’s the reality that these websites bring out in terms of the social hypocrisy and façade, that’s admirable. Not saying they aim at it, most likely they do not. Nonetheless, the fact is they do bring out the shallowness and double standards of who we are offline and who we are online. The difference between who we are and who we want to be has never before been reconciled so effortlessly. In that sense adult dating sites make for a good socio-psychological study as well as an experience to gain in life.

Latin Dating? Some Bits Of Advice.

Latin Dating? Some Bits Of Advice.

Latin American people are vibrant, hot and bold. Women are comfortable in their skins while still carrying their feminine charms in a very non-threatening and non-intimidating manner. Men on the other hand, are expressive, flirtatious, macho and generally caring. Oh and they are both hot enough to make me drool!

One of the best phases in my dating life has been when I was exploring international dating sites.  I realized that I liked the crowd on Latin dating sites the best. In fact my current boyfriend and I met on that website and it turned out to be the best dating site experience for both of us.

While my own boyfriend is very accepting and happy-go-lucky of my non-latino manners, he did explain to me a lot of dating etiquette while explaining to me general social behavior when around his family and friends.

One of the best pieces of advice he gives to anyone who wants to date a Latin partner is to learn salsa. For men, it opens up an option to ask a woman to dance with him (Latin American men are very direct that way). For women, it opens up the option of a man asking them to dance with him. Basically a chance to express interest, dancing badly may not be a very good idea, more so for a man. Women will roll their eyes or avoid dancing with you if you step on their toes.

Conventionally Latin women don’t take lead in expressing interest, thanks to the machismo, but non-latino women are still given a bit of leeway for not knowing the manners. Obviously, this problem is easier to tackle now, thanks to the presence of latin dating sites. However, as a non-latino woman, be a little careful because you may assumed to be easy or more willing and ready for sex.

Almost all latin dating is NOT about one night stands. People do ask each other out on second or third dates but being asked out on the first date should ideally make you wary.

Like I learnt, the machismo runs deep. So as a man, make sure you pay all the bills. As a woman, never offer to pay for the date, or even your share. Don’t even try to look at the bill or he’ll most likely be offended, even if you found him online on international dating sites.

Latin American people are usually very direct when it comes to praising physical beauty, approaching a woman, holding hands, touching the knee or the shoulder and / or skin contact. Do not read too much into it either. Similarly, keeping distance can be assumed as a lack of interest or worse. To all of this, I will only say that go by your gut. As long as you remember that their general sense of physical personal space is lesser than in the west otherwise, you’ll do fine with adjusting to their proximity.

One of the best dating site options to find Latin American people to date would be to try international dating sites or specifically Latin dating sites. Do try and share how your journey was.

I’m A Sugar Baby Turned His Wife And I Found Him On One Of The Sugar Daddy Sites

I’m A Sugar Baby Turned His Wife And I Found Him On One Of The Sugar Daddy Sites

Hi, I’m Lisa. Hey, of course that’s not my real name! The story that I am going to share with you needs my identity to be discreet. You must be wondering, if I have to keep my identity discreet, why even tell this story? Or you must be wondering if my story is a story of abuse, a story of danger, a story of intense passion? What is this mysterious story all about?

Well, well, well… My story is about why I started looking for a partner on sugar daddy sites.

Like a lot of stories, mine is that of a happy ending. My sugar daddy decided to marry me. But it wasn’t all hunky dory to begin with. I was 21 then. I was very pretty looking, had a hot body, and was studying. And, I wasn’t on the best terms with my parents.

By the way, in India, you need parents to back you up even when you’re legally an adult.  I didn’t have them on my side and I wanted a good education for myself. I had two options, return to my parents and let them decide how my life and career would be. Or, I could be an escort. I wanted to choose none. That is when I discovered millionaire dating sites.

Just like online dating sites, these sites are places to connect beautiful people with rich people. I was initially very nervous, hoping that it wasn’t what I was scared of – another escort site. I must admit, amidst all dating sites I explored, sugar daddy sites were the best.

The best dating site in my life is where I found Mark, my sugar daddy initially and my husband now. Mark was a thorough gentleman. Money didn’t make him a jerk. He told me very clearly that he was looking for an exclusive arrangement while I was with him. Mark was also 15 years my senior and undergoing divorce. It was a bit scary to begin with.

Mark requested for my social company once a week. He also requested for my personal time over a long weekend, once or twice a month on an ongoing basis. In return, Mark paid for my fee when I wanted to learn designing, creative writing and marketing. Mark also covered my living spaces in a safe, posh colony of one of the top cities in India.

Frankly, having a sugar daddy, made my life easy. No it wasn’t effortless. I had to ensure that my schedules were managed well in advance to ensure my availability when Mark requested it. I also had to perform at studies, excel in career, because it was his money being spent on it. I tried my best and it wasn’t easy, but I wasn’t worried about expenses.

We dated in an arrangement for almost 2 years when one final day, he asked me the big question. I had absolutely no reason to say no! We have been together for one year now and I am absolutely not ashamed that I went to search for a partner on sugar daddy sites.

If you’re a sugar baby, let me share a secret, do not let anyone tell you what to do. Work on yourself, exercise caution, do not behave like an entitled brat and believe me one of the millionaire dating sites, will turn out to be the best dating site in your life. Just like it did in mine!

Difference Between Dating An Asian Guy And A Caucasian Guy

Difference Between Dating An Asian Guy And A Caucasian Guy

I have been in the dating scene for quite a few years. It’s not because I don’t plan to settle down, but more because I enjoy researching human behavior firsthand. It is very enlightening to observe similarities and differences on multiple levels. However, having been in the scene for long enough also means that I have got a chance to try various dating models. Offline dating, friend referrals, parties, bars, discotheques, as well as online dating sites; you name it, I’ve tried it.

During the process I have also tried international dating sites because I wanted to experience how different people behaved. The most prominent difference that I noticed was between Asian and Caucasian guys.

Manners are something that causes one major difference between the men of these two ethnicities. While Asian men have amazing table manners, things like opening the car door, holding the jacket etc. are still something most Asian men are not used to when dating.

I dated some amazing Asian guys from an Asian dating site. One of their best qualities is that they never let the other person pay the bills. So, in general it’s good etiquette to let Asian guys pick the place rather than imposing on them on the choice of place. As long as you know that the place is centrally located and public enough J

Similarly, another trait that differentiated Asian men from their Caucasian counterparts on one of the best dating site was the fact that a lot of Asian guys are mama’s boys. Now, this may not necessarily be a bad thing that they need their parents’ approval. However, there’s also a statistically reported trend, that Asian men and their families have a preference for Asian women. So unless you’re Asian or have mixed ethnicity, you may want to tread carefully.

Similarly, Asian guys are often not big on public displays of affection. Believe me when I say this, they’re one of the most loving breed of men around. They and their families are very kind, generous, caring, and affectionate and will pamper you like a princess, but don’t expect a lot of hugs, cuddles, kisses or at times, even a lot of holding hands in public, more so when around family.

By the way, let me also bust a myth or two about Asian guys while we are at it. Not all Asian men live with their families. They can be very masculine and macho when they decide to be, which is usually behind closed doors. They are keepers, if you’re looking for one. But most importantly, their hearts are large enough to accommodate you and everyone you care for, should they really find long-term compatibility with you.

On this note, I do strongly recommend ladies who’re reading this article to try an Asian dating site or at least some international dating sites, to find more about the kind of man you may really end up liking. To have your best dating site experience yet, you do need to try options before you say meh!

How To Date A Russian Man

How To Date A Russian Man

There are all kinds of men and women on International dating sites. However, unless you date a Russian guy, you don’t even begin to grasp the depth to which Russian dating sites can test your patience. I was in Russia last year for an assignment and I used the best dating site for dating Russians. I must admit, I was enthralled by my experiential learning on how to date a Ruskie.

To date a Russian man, the first thing you do is learn some language. Broken it can be, less than fluent it can be, but nada, zilch ? That it cannot be! Not because they don’t like people who cannot speak Russian, but because they really love it when they notice your attempts to learn their language. A lot of times, what I spoke in Russian was barely correct, but my dates and their families found it very cute and adored me for it. Believe it or not, it’s so cute that I was always surrounded by impressed ‘awwws’!

Looking pretty, cooking pretty and other such conventional roles are a great theme in Russian dating. My experiences with different guys I met on Russian dating sites have proven that women and men are expected to play their conventional roles. Also, it’s important to keep up the appearance. So, you will always be expected to look more than presentable. Your apartment would need to be spic and span. If you have a cooking arrangement (I didn’t, I stayed at the hotel), it’s expected you know how to cook well, even if your own cuisine. In fact your guy might actually make those weird faces, if you think you could just get out there lounging in a jeans and tee.

At the same time however, all Russian guys I met on International dating sites liked to date women, not timid little girls. Russian women are no wall-flowers or door-mats. They’re fierce, vocal and very expressive. They have an opinion and they are capable of expressing it clearly. That’s one trait Russian men admire a lot in their women.

Also, remember that Russians are a very vibrant people. Their opinions, thoughts, verbal expression is all very passionate and vibrant. This means just like you’re expected to be fierce and expressive a lot of what Russian men might say may come across as aggressive in tone, while it is not! Not everything they may say is going to be personal or an attack at you. It’s just who they are, passionate and high on energy!

Irrespective of whether you meet your Ruskie at a work party or on the world’s best dating site, one thing is for sure. He’s going to be one of the most passionate lovers, you will ever meet. His blood will boil, sing and dance at the tune of yours and his heart will be yours, provided you inflame his gaze and keep his hearth and heart warm!